An angry man talks about COD

The other day I decided that I would start blogging so here goes. Seeing as this is my first blog post I had better introduce myself. For those of you who don’t know me, I am Will, I’m 20 and I was born and raised in Canterbury. Currently I study microbiology (little biology) at the Uni of Manchester and I suppose it’s going okay. Interests include rugby (playing/watching), football (watching/playing badly), books and getting angry on COD.

           

I shall admit to it now that I am GOD AWFUL at Call of Duty, my K:D ratio is less than 0.5 and I usually end up swearing at some acne-ridden American 14 year old who ‘quick scopes’ or whatever the fuck that is. Man points have probably been lost due to this but oh well. I cannot physically understand how one person can push a button better than another. I have been playing for at least 6 month on various COD games and I genuinely don’t think I have improved. There is no way that you can learn how to point a pretend gun at someone better than you already can. The only possible thing I can think of is improving reaction times and even that plateaus after a while. It begs the question; do these people have NOTHING BETTER TO DO than sit in a dark room and pretend to kill strangers. These folks that perfect their ‘drop-shotting’ and the hated ‘quick-scopers’ must spend the majority of their free time on it. And because they can do all this crap they assume they are better human beings than those who can’t. Tell you what smart-arse, let’s drop you into Afghanistan, let you run at Al-Qaeda and see how long you last with your poncey sniper. I guarantee it won’t be long, like Manchester City’s participation in the Champions League. Your move.

           

However I think shooters are a great way to chill out (unless Spotty McLoner shoots me in the head).  This is why I don’t get reviews that slam FPS games. They get so hung up on how ‘the game play is simple and repetitive’ and how ‘the plot is akin to slamming a brick into your face’. Well Mr Reviewer, as funny as you are, you’re wrong. I mean you’re right, but you’re wrong. We know that they are ‘bad’ games from the perspective of plot and character development (let’s be honest, no one gave a shit when any of the characters died). They are though, great games for having a laugh. Despite the frustrations they are fun to play. Yes they are inherently racist and glorify war, but as a game to play with other people? Very few can beat them. In the future I’ll probably rant about other types of games such as FIFA and fighters, but I think I’ll make this one short and wrap up here. Thanks, I hope you were at least mildly entertained and think about reading my next one.